In this episode, Amy Vetter gives the major takeaways of the interviews you’ve listened to for Quarter 1 of 2021. There are two key themes running through these interviews: how our families impact our belief systems and how we should incorporate mindfulness practices into our workday. Our family is an essential pillar of our lives, but they don’t always give us a healthy and positive outlook. That is why mindfulness is vital, so we can observe the thoughts running through our minds and detect if they make us better persons or not. We are so excited that it has been a year and a half of great interviews, and we appreciate your support of this podcast!

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Quarter 1 2021 In Review!

This series is all about getting honest with ourselves and noticing the things that we carry with us. We each have our own life experiences to go from. Sometimes it's hard to truly understand what it's like to be someone else. What we can do to create change starts with us. If each of us took one action each day in our own lives, we can collectively change the world around us. What does it take? It takes work and practice. We have to be honest with ourselves as we get there.

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Welcome to this episode where I review our first quarter of 2021 and the interviews that I had the pleasure of having during this quarter, and the lessons that we took away from those interviews to maybe step back and think about how you can incorporate those into your life. There were two key themes that I see during this quarter of interviews. One is all about family and how family and our origin family impacts our belief systems into how we go about running our own families, our careers and so forth, and the power that those belief systems have in our lives. The second is all about how we incorporate mindfulness practices into our workday. They aren't just practices we do on our own but how we operationalize those practices so that we can benefit from them in our relationships, and how we work in our customer and coworker relationships and so forth.

Impact Of The Family To Our Belief Systems

The first interview that I had was with Tashia Batstone who is with CPA Canada. She talked about how the family has always been first in any new role or work that she has done in her career. She has that belief system from the parents that she had where she felt that she was first no matter what they had going on. She talks about how hard to live this belief system when you're traveling and so forth and making sure that you're still incorporating time if you have children to do homework, that you're connecting with the people that you're closest with and not losing sight of that. When we get into our careers and all the work that needs to be done, we can get focused on the work and start losing sight of the things that are important to us. I thought that was important.

She also had the benefit of seeing that you had to speak up and ask for the things that you want by having the example of her parents as well. As she moved through her career, she realized that to be successful, she needed to have passion for what she did. Also, to be supportive of the people around her. When we talk about family, it's not just the family that you're born with, but it's the family in the workplace to be available for, but also to be present during those interactions so that they know that you care. When we go with that family-first mentality, the definition of family can be expanded so that we completely understand the importance of these people that are in our lives and we don't lose sight of them along the way.

The other interview where the family was at impact was with Joseph Oniwor. He discussed his father leaving as a young child, and the impact that made on him and his belief systems about himself. It was a drastically different interview from Tashia, where he was talking about he didn't have the acceptance of himself instead. He had to learn how to build that resilience and that self-worth within himself, and building mindset practices over time when he was seeing his life go off track. Also, how he learned over time to step back and understand when there were messages going through his mind, wherever those messages are coming from. A lot of times we don't pause in those moments. We allow that monkey mind to go and that bad self-talk.

We often say in yoga that we would never be friends with our minds. We would never allow ourselves to be treated the way that we talk to ourselves. When we noticed that self-talk happening, that is the time to pause and assess where is that message coming from and why am I thinking it. When we can start labeling the why instead of judging it, it allows ourselves to move from negative thinking to positive thinking, or to release negative thoughts that are going in our mind. It might be taking away from our energy that might be getting in the way of how we want to succeed in life. It's important to take these moments to observe during our days.

The other interview that I had was with Jennifer Briggs who is the CEO of the Indiana CPA Society. She also had a great story about family, and how that benefited her and helped her with the success that she's had in her career. She described her upbringing with her father being in the Army. They are moving all over the world and having to make relationships and meet new people. She talked about the process that she would go through to meet new people and how to make friends, which is all about making relationships. The other thing that was important in that upbringing that has created success for her is that adapting to change.

When we get to the point of being too comfortable or getting in a maintenance mode, a lot of times that's when things in our life start going off track. We aren't as focused and looking around to see what is permanent and not permanent, and what we need to plan for into our future or let go of that we might be holding on too hard. This type of training and her belief systems not only helped her and her career of asking for the things that she wants but striving for that as well. Also, when she's worked with outside firms that are going through change, understanding the adaptability that you need to have to make real change. A lot of times we talk about change but we don't necessarily do the actions or the work that we need to do to see it through.

When you've lived it, you can better communicate it, explain it, and provide the actions to people so that they're able to follow suit or give examples for that. One of the things that's important about the way we observe our life or the decisions that we make that have given us success from our past is also sharing that with the people around us and not believing that it's an individual journey. As Jennifer talked about, much of her success came from making relationships and learning how to have those relationships. As most of us know, in order to have relationships, that's a give and take. We need to think about how we give, and maybe sometimes in our head give more than the other people in our relationships without expecting something in return so that give and take happens naturally.

Another interview that I had that was very much centered around family was Kim Barnes. Kim runs a company called Barnes Media. We had a very heartfelt conversation as well about her family and the effect that it had on her as far as wanting to be perfect and figuring things out. Part of that was from when she grew up, her father fell into hard times and not having that predictability. Also, the expectation of her parents for her to achieve things that maybe he wasn't achieving, but he knew was possible.

It is important for us to understand and question why we might have certain belief systems of needing to be perfect. Sometimes we don't realize this for a long time. It's the way we ran our life. It's what we did to survive. It is a control mechanism so that we can control our surroundings and the outcomes and so forth. We don't necessarily always benefit the people around us from some of these things that we do to be able to survive. We can find the things that are good about it that help us in our future as well.

In my conversation with Kim, it went both ways. Because she learned how to rely on herself, it gave her confidence in the things that she wanted to do, going into college and media when everyone was saying, “It may not be possible.” That just wasn't an option for her. It gave her resilience in that standpoint, but then it drove her too hard as far as this feeling of perfection. She had to learn overtime how to go with the flow or how to let things go when things are enough. If she doesn't do certain tasks or work, that it's okay if we get to the same outcome, and how do you get yourself okay if someone goes to the same activity maybe in a different way. It's an important work for us to do. That's why these types of conversations and observations are practices. It's something that we have to continue to do. We have to take that into our lives and decide, is this serving us or is it not serving us? What would we do differently if we were going to go about this in a different way?

My interview with Kyla Martin was also about family and how that led to some of the decisions that she made in her career. At the beginning of her career, she made some decisions that went against what her soul was telling her she wanted for her life. The reason she went against it was because of her father giving up the life that he wanted. What he was good at was art, but he went into a safe career for financial security. This was a belief system that was in her family. Her creative side or the work that she wanted to do, she couldn't predict whether that would give her the financial security that she was looking for based on what she had been taught over time. It wasn't until she went through her own self-journey that she realized that it wasn't serving her. It wasn't working within her body to make her feel passionate about the work that she did.

These are the moments where we don't necessarily want to give up everything that we do because we might feel off. It's more the exploration. This becomes the research of your life and what is working and not working. What things am I good at that I need to start assessing for myself and how do I integrate that into my career? I can tell you in my own career that this has happened many times. I look at my career in decades almost of the little shifts I've made each time by new experiences that I've had, not only with work but also outside of work. I've been able to figure out a way to incorporate it into the work that I've done. Those become little pivots. It's not a wholesale change. These pivots happen over time.

It could mean that you are doing a side hustle, trying things out to see if this is something you'd want to do. You start figuring out how do you incorporate all sides of you into a business so that you can tap into your soul or your career. You want to feel that you're bringing your authentic self to work. You were not holding something back because of duty or some belief system that might not be aligned with who you are or what you're capable of. How could you take the work that you do now without leaving it, and make it 2% different that would more be aligned to your soul? It doesn't have to be big changes.

It can be little things that when you go home at the end of the day, you feel satisfied. It's the things that you're doing outside of work, the hobbies that you make time for that fill your soul. You feel better about the work that you're doing during the day. It's producing the life that you want to do those hobbies. It's flipping the perspective to make sure that you are executing your life from where you are, from your intuition or gut. It is something that isn't a rush. It is ways like Kyla talked about building bridges instead of jumping off a cliff. It's the little things that you do overtime that starts getting you to your life's work. There's no rush. It's the journey of it.

The other interview that I had was with Emily Soccorsy. We talked about her immigrant family and the impact that her grandparents had on the decisions that she made and wanting to serve them. I related so much to this conversation as I have immigrant grandparents. Not that I knew them as well as Emily did, but I did know the sacrifices that they had made to come to this country to live a new life and to benefit future generations. A lot of times we don't realize that when we have that sense of duty for whatever reason, it doesn't have to be that one, but we might be making decisions that are outside or that's off from our soul. We need to understand how we still serve that heritage, make sure that we feel the sacrifice, and we are serving back to that sacrifice while we create the life that we want as well. How do we bring that all together?

The important part of the conversation with Emily was about how she was going to pay it forward with her own daughters and the work that she does for people. She’s helping them find their passions and be able to communicate it in ways that are authentic to them. When she could go back and see that no matter if she did the more stable job or ended up going into business for herself, the lessons that she learned from her grandparents weren't necessarily all about safety. It was about working hard and knowing that you have that work ethic that will bring success, whatever that might be. Sometimes at the other end of things, it's not what we initially thought it was going to be. It's being open to that process and watching what comes up for you so that you're aware.

Incorporating The Practice Of Mindfulness

The second area that I provided are some interviews that I had done a couple of years ago that I had never published on this show. They were important interviews and there are more to come here in the second quarter. The first one was with Tamara Levitt. She is from Calm, which is a Meditation app and in charge of all the mindfulness activity programs that are delivered through that app. We talked about how to incorporate mindfulness organizationally into a business to give people space for these types of activities that they need to reset and become more present in their day.

We also talked about the importance of sleep. Sometimes we don't talk about this enough but sleep is as important as exercise if not more. It helps us clear out the emotions at night from that day so that when we get to the next day, we can be present. We're not carrying forward the feelings from the day before We're allowing our body to process it and our brain to move forward. These types of meditations are just as important as a seated meditation that you might do in the morning or throughout the day. These sleep meditations at night to get us to a place of calm and peace so our body can settle naturally is a practice that I have had to learn over time as well because sleep was always such a struggle for me. It's putting the right practices in place but also not rushing to sleep. It's giving yourself that space to be guided into a calmer sleep. Hopefully, that was an important interview for you to think about. When you show up into the workplace the next day, you're thinking about, “How do I settle myself down at night to relieve some of the stress that affects my health, to feel better in the morning when I'm getting up to start my day again?”

The other interview that I had about mindfulness at work was with Peter Bostelmann, who works at SAP, that is in charge of their mindfulness programs. He talked about the journey of creating this mindfulness program at such a large company. He was the unlikely candidate to be leading this as he was an engineer. This was something that he did on the side that he did personally. Once he started doing it personally, he started realizing the difference it was making in his workday when he meditated and put those practices into place. Many programs in corporations, when you go and try to say, “We need to do a mindfulness program,” that might not be well-received. It was doing little things over time within the company that was elevating him in this area. People are asking for more, them realizing how it was helping.

When we wait for corporations sometimes and then get mad that they're not doing certain things, we forget that we have the power personally to be able to make an impact. It takes each one of us to create change. We don't have to wait for someone else to do that. Because of his efforts and the feedback that he was getting overtime, this program started coming to be. Now they even have a waitlist because of how many people want to get into this program. It is such an important discussion that we had about how to do this and how to track metrics around it to support the investment your company is making in mindfulness programs if you decide to incorporate them into the business. Also, how you sustain it organizationally and track it to make sure that people are living these practices that you're teaching, not just talking about them.

To get started with those as well, I launched the new series during this quarter called B3 Breaks and those began in March 2021. Those are little practices that you can incorporate into your life. These are short episodes, maybe 5, 10 minutes or less. Each one of them will give you tips on incorporating mindfulness-type activities into your day. Little things that you can do and start seeing how they work for your body. Are you seeing any difference internally when you do them each day? You pick one thing that you're going to practice each day. How is it affecting you? How does it make you feel? How does it make other people feel around you? What are you noticing different in your experiences? It’s important for you to think about when you are starting to go on this journey. This is an easy way to get started. That's why I'm putting them out there for you.

When we talk about breaking belief systems, it takes work. Part of that work is when we're not paying attention. Mindfulness activities allow us to give our brain the space to have those a-ha moments or observations that come up for us. When we keep moving through our day, we might not even notice it. It gives ourselves the opportunity to see and observe the thoughts that are going through our mind. We start noticing, are those our thoughts or are those of somebody else's thoughts? Are those my beliefs or someone told me to believe that? What does that mean to me? If it wasn't my belief, what is my belief? Start questioning things? These practices will help you in doing that, but also focusing on that energy that we want internally to create joy in ourselves to create better energy for those around us.

There are lots of ways for you to get more involved in these programs. Not only through the shows, but through the B3 Method Institute where you can go online and get started with these practices. I’ll send 10 to 15 minute little videos to you each week. With those videos, you will be asked to do a little bit of self-discovery, set an intention for the week and then get started on the next week. If you'd like to try the B3 Method Institute, you can go to AmyVetter.com and there is a dropdown for the B3 Method Institute. If you want to get started for free and see how it works, I have a special code for you. That's Our Leaders are Mindful. That will give you 30 days free of the learning institute so that you can start seeing how you go on this journey. I want to provide that support to you. You can then decide if you'd like to stay on the journey. It will also give you access to meditation and restorative yoga videos and all types of webinars on these topics if you want to go deeper into them.

For those of you that have been supporting this show, I want to thank you for your support and your engagement in these important conversations. I hope that you were finding lessons in these interviews that are helping you in your own life. Tweak 2%, that pivot may give you a different perspective in how you interact with the people around you. If you'd like to get our newsletter, go to my website. You will see a pop-up come on there. You can sign up for our newsletter and we are sending out special newsletters for this show. You can get other outside resources and materials. We're doing a lot of work to keep you on your journey. You've gotten started so we're here to stay with you and walk with you on this path so that you can create the energy that you want for yourself and those around you.

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Thank you for taking the time out of your day. I hope you will take a moment to pause before entering back into your day to reflect on this show and note 1 to 2 actions you are inspired to do from this conversation that you could incorporate into your life. To go back to this episode and any other, you can find them at www.AmyVetter.com/breakingbeliefspodcast and related videos on my YouTube channel. For daily inspiration, follow me on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn, @AmyVetterCPA. I hope that you will choose to like this and subscribe to this show on iTunes, Spotify and more so that you can join us for more inspiration on our next episode.

Important Links:

• Tashia Batstone – Past episode

• Joseph Oniwor – Past episode

• Jennifer Briggs – Past episode

• Kim Barnes – Past episode

• Kyla Martin - Past episode

• Emily Soccorsy – Past episode

• Tamara Levitt – Past episode

• Peter Bostelmann – Past episode

• YouTube – Amy Vetter

• @AmyVetterCPA – Instagram

• Twitter – Amy Vetter

• Facebook – Amy Vetter

• LinkedIn – Amy Vetter

• iTunes - Breaking Beliefs Podcast

• Spotify – Breaking Beliefs Podcast

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